Nanhe Nawaab

GOING UNDER the knife to reclaim virginity is a trend that seems to have shifted base from the Middle East to smaller Indian cities.

City doctors say that where almost 80 per cent of surgeries were conducted on those from the Middle East a few years ago, now women from small cities and towns in Maharashtra and neighbouring states – like Surat and Baroda – form the bulk.

If restructuring the hymen can help restructure lives after premarital sex, then hymenoplasty seems to be the right answer. The procedure involves creating a membrane about an inch into the vagina that resembles a natural hymen.

“I get occasional requests from young women who want to know about such procedures. Most of the requests come from small towns or some select communities, where virginity really counts,” said Dr Rishima Pai, gynaecologist with Lilavati and Jaslok hospital.

“With awareness and easy availability, more women are coming forward, sometimes accompanied by family members,” said Dr Milind Wagh, cosmetic surgeon at Dr L.H.Hiranandani Hospital.

“Another reason for the growing trend maybe the costs involved. With the procedure coming for anything between Rs 25,000 and Rs 40,000, those from small town can afford it. The demand from these regions is more because acceptance levels of premarital sex is lower,” said Dr Mohan Thomas, cosmetic surgeon at Breach Candy Hospital.

“It is disturbing but true that women are expected to be the epitome of virtue. As long as it’s her decision, it’s fine. But family and societal expectations to make her appear ‘pure’ is unfair,” said Dr Sharita Shah, psychiatrist at Saifee, Bhatia and Hurkisondas hospitals.

Image Courtesy: www.fabsmusic.co.uk/background/Fabs-ILostMyVirginity.jpg

The term ‘one-night stand’ comes from the world of showbiz, originally meaning a one- off theatre performance. Those three magic words - ‘one’, ‘night’ and ’stand - sound so casual and carefree. But read on, there are five important tips to consider, before starring in a one-night-only hook-up.
Emergency exit
Pre-arrange a call from a trusted dost early in the proceedings. That way, if your date is a crashing bore or potential psychopath, you can make a quick getaway. What? My aged daadi in Bhatinda has been rushed to hospital? You want me to come immediately? The phone-a-friend trick can be a timely lifeline.
Money nahi hai to honey hai
The rules of engagement in a one-night stand are simple. There’s no question of will they/won’t they? The main course on the menu is sex. There’s no need to spend your hard-earned rupees on London priced drinks at Tabula Rasa or Shalom. Instead, splash out 10 rupees max on bhel puri, and wash it down with a cholera cocktail of sugarcane juice. Then, the formalities of wining and dining over, make a beeline back to yours for something even spicier.
Help! I’ve been burgled!
It’s Murphy’s Law that the only time you score on a night out is when your place looks like it hasn’t seen a duster in weeks. The solution is, as you open the door… exclaim in wild surprise that your room has been raided by robbers. Why else would everything be in such disarray? It may work. But might not account for the overflow of old pizza boxes, or the science experiment growing in week-old tea cups.
Emergency contraception
You came. You saw. And you’re about to conquer. There’s just one final hurdle to get over before you jump into bed. Girls, did you forget to shave your legs before the date? Boys, are you wearing 25-rupee underwear, instead of your Calvin Klein pulling pants? If the answer to the above questions is ‘yes’, then the emergency contraception worked. Unshaved legs and cheap chaddis are the most effective methods of preventing unwanted pregnancy. Being too embarrassed to get undressed is the ultimate night-before-the-morning-after-pill.
No kismat konnection
Even if the sex was mind-blowing, do remember a one-night stand is just that. One night. Don’t go looking for a ‘kismat konnection’ with your new bedroom buddy. Don’t even expect a good morning cup of coffee. Just get up while they’re still zedding, hunt around the room for discarded clothing, and escape from the scene of the crime. Now for the hard part.
The walk of shame.
You are dishevelled, bleary-eyed and still half drunk. You are modeling bed head, and you’re in totally unsuitable evening wear that gives off the smell of sex and smoke. Respectable Delhiites on their way to work may give you a double take as you slink home. Still, if you got your paisa vasool from the sex, that’s worth any amount of curious looks from strangers.

Source: Yahoo 

Arguing with girls, like yoga, is a meaningless and inane exercise. A lot of guys hate doing it, most notably because it never seems like we can win. But you can win. Here’s how.

Step 1. Abandon all logic. Girls don’t use it, and you certainly shouldn’t allow it to handicap you.
Step 2. If you believe strongly in something, do NOT give in to any aspect of it. Compromise is useless against girls, because they will rationalize that if they can get you to concede to one element, they can get you to quit on the whole fuckin’ Periodic Table. (Nothing like a little chemistry humor, right?)

Step 3. Don’t be afraid to take cheap shots. Ever argue with a girl about something and they randomly insult you with something that has no relevance to the argument? That’s their way of trying to wear you down and push you off-topic. Fight fire with fire, I say. Tell her she has a fat ass, small boobs, an ugly face, disorienting facial hair, unwieldy hips, and is a genuinely awful person.

Step 4. Cite precedent. Girls have no concept of historical factors relating to the current situation. Most girls reading this just went over to dictionary.com to see what “precedent” meant.

Step 5. Interrupt her. Don’t let her talk. Girls hate that like they hate other girls. It’s hilarious, too. They get all frazzled.

Step 6. Don’t take her seriously. Laugh at every point she deems serious in nature. Fart, if possible. Derail her emotional train.

Step 7. If the argument escalates, cut off all communication with her. If a girl can’t find you, she can’t continue arguing about bullshit. Change your phone number, relocate, and get a name change if you must.

Step 8. Don’t be fooled by “Let’s stop arguing please.” That’s their way of making you let your guard down, so they can swoop in after you’re worn down. Instead, say something like “Yeah, all this being right is exhausting for me.” Pisses them off. Just trust me.

Step 9. Compare her unfavorably with another girl. This is especially effective if the comparison is with a girl that they simply abhor. Tell her something like, “Lisa is so much more compassionate than you.” Girls hate other girls, like a deer hates a shotgun. And how do you take down a deer? Exactly.

Step 10. Don’t be intimidated by the water works. That’s their ultimate contingency, knowing that guys can’t deal with a crying girl. Stay strong, don’t let yourself get emotional, just think of something funny. Replay scenes from “Office Space” in your head if you must.

Step 11. Bust out, “I don’t feel like fighting. I’ve proven my point.” Then stop. Leave the argument. It pisses them off because a guy’s natural reaction is to resolve, whereas a girl’s is to continue forever and ever until the end of time until they hear that they are right. If a guy decides that he is right and won’t budge, their whole concept of male-female relations is shot to shit. Again, mind games.

Step 12. Ask her if she’s on the rag. Self-explanatory.

Step 13. When all else fails, tell her she’s just like her mother. It’s an ace-in-the-hole and will emotionally cripple her to such a degree she may even forget her whole argument.

Remember, girls are the less intelligent of the genders. All throughout history men have out-thought, out-invented, and out-created women in every facet of existence. Isn’t it about time we won an argument for once? Gentlemen, that time is now.

Disclaimer: This article is intended not for any offence and is just published for comic and fun reading.
Source: Pointsincase

This story appeared in HT Cafe on 22/04/08 and this is what i call “IPL Effect”.

Indian’s are crazy about two things - Bollywood and cricket. And with both coming together this season in the form of IPL matches, which will continue till June 1, many have shifted their loyalties from their loved ones and even work, to the idiot box.

Twenty-six-year-old Ashish Sinha, recently told his girlfriend Neha not to ‘bug’ him on days when his favourite teams were playing.

And how did she react? Says Neha, “I was kind of prepared for it; I might even watch a couple of matches with him.” Unlucky few While their problem has been nicely sorted out, Sachin Kumar, a chartered accountant, will have to go underground for a while. “I’ve told my girlfriend that I’ll be doing late shifts in the office. But I’ll be watching the matches on the big screen. Women never understand these guy things,” he sighs.

Kashmeera Sahni, an HR executive, and her group, have come up with a special strategy “Since all of us . can’t be absent from work at the same time, we have a plan - we’ve decided on days when we will ‘fall sick’, depending on which team is playing,” says Sahni.
I ndian’s are crazy about two things - Bollywood and cricket. And with both coming together this season in the form of IPL matches, which will continue till June 1, many have shifted their loyalties from their loved ones and even work, to the idiot box. Twenty-six-year-old Ashish Sinha, recently told his girlfriend Neha not to ‘bug’ him on days when his favourite teams were playing. And how did she react? Says Neha, “I was kind of prepared for it; I might even watch a couple of matches with him.” Unlucky few While their problem has been nicely sorted out, Sachin Kumar, a chartered accountant, will have to go under- ground for a while. “I’ve told my girlfriend that I’ll be doing late shifts in the office. But I’ll be watching the matches on the big screen. Women never understand these guy things,” he sighs. Kashmeera Sahni, an HR executive, and her group, have come up with a special strategy “Since all of us . can’t be absent from work at the same time, we have a plan - we’ve decided on days when we will ‘fall sick’, depending on which team is playing,” says Sahni.

This interesting story appeared in Hindustan Times some days back. Read it!

A FEMALE real estate agent’s sex addiction has compelled her to pounce on more than one thousand men. Amy Michaels, 32, has confessed on bedding over 1000 men. However, she insists she’s no slut.

“I’ve had sex with at least 1,000 men-but I’m no slut. I’m a sex addict,” News of the World quoted Michaels, as saying.

“I began doing it with clients while we were supposed to be viewing houses. I had a boyfriend at the time but it wasn’t enough. At the same time I was also at it with a colleague at work. We used a house we were supposed to be selling and one night I ended up in a threesome with him and his flatmate.”

She lost her virginity at an early age of 17 when she took a job at McDonald’s while at college on a business studies course. “I ended up sleeping with the boss while I was already having a fling with another boy there, having sex anywhere we could, even before kiddies’ parties. Her addiction even made her pounce on a security guard while working as a PR at a music festival.

Well Nanhe discussed about this woman. Many of his friends said that she is a slut while others believed that she is a sex maniac. Nanhe felt that the lady is a “SOCIAL WORKER”.
Yes because she is doing social work by providing “SEX” to so many men who live and die for sex only. This woman will be huge success in India and will be received very well by Indian men. India is already facing the problem of dipping sex ratio. If experts are to be believed, there will be huge shortage of girls in next 50 years and thus many men will remain unmarried whole life. This woman will be “handy” to all those unmarried men. In fact India requires more such “social workers”. These social work can also check the crime rate against woman such as rape, molestation etc. Imagine someone asking the lady about her profession. She says “Hi! I am social worker and would like to help you out as well.” It sounds great yaar.
Nanhe salutes this Woman.

Nanhe couldn’t find a girl for himself till date, but he has studied a lot on how to seduce and attract the girl. He has been a failure when it comes to girls but you can try his tips and succeed. If you have really succeeded then just post a comment to let Nanhe know about that. Here goes our very own Nanhe.

Guys, before you can date women, you will first have to learn how to approach them and meet them. When you find a really hot girl that interests you, you can never take her on a date unless you go straight to her and use all your charm that you have mastered so you will not get rejected.

You will not Spend Valentine’s Day Alone

• If you are really serious about taking your success with women to a level you never ever dreamed possible. Check this out and I will tell you the reason you should avoid so you’ll never have to face failure again.
• I haven’t used pheromones or colognes that they say do attract women when you use them, but I do know that their effects do die out. You have to realize that love is not something “instant”. It is something you build one brick at a time, invest hardwork and real emotions before you can reap results and be loved in return.
• Picking up women can seem like a full time job for most men but if you know where and when you can go to find them, the choices of women you can get is endless. Go to where there are a lot of them!
• Friendships with women are wonderful and some guys even have a girl for a best friend. These friendships are special in their own way BUT we all have to agree that being more than a friend to a really hot girl compares to nothing. Sources

If any girl who has read this and want to go on a date with Nanhe, do let him know. He is waiting and waiting……..

A seductive glance or a smart pickup line -all of us know that flirting is the crucial first step of the dating ladder. This vital interaction can either make or break our chances of developing new relationships.

For some, flirting comes as naturally as breathing. For others, the mere thought is enough to make them tense. Many agree that one does not have to be a raving beauty or a stud to flirt successfully.. it’s only attitude. Eye contact Rahul, a diehard flirt professes, “Be positive, upbeat and self-confident.. and you’ll waste no time in attracting the opposite sex. If you’re not the confident sort, no one has to know that. Project an air of confidence by standing up straight with your chin held high and shoulders pulled back.”

Sonal feels that eye contact is a great way to flirt across the room, if one is too shy to approach the person. She adds, “This might entice the person to make the first move. Combined with a cheerful smile, this is the best way to look approachable and attract someone without saying a word.”

She feels that you have to give the impression that you’re having a good time.. people find you more attractive. For the bold sort, there’s the tried-and-tested ‘break the ice by making conversation’. But some argue that it’s difficult to carry on a conversation if the answers received are in monosyllables. Physical contact So the trick is to ask questions that require a longer response. Kunal, a self-proclaimed flirt feels that slight physical contact can work wonders. “If you are in a crowded place and it’s hard to hear, lean forward and rest your hand very lightly on the other person’s arm while he or she is talking to you.

“If the person does not approve of this, he or she will pull away. Look out for these signals and back off if necessary. You shouldn’t come across as a creep or get slapped,” he ends with a laugh. Common interests According to experts, after you’ve managed to strike a conversation, it’s important to show genuine interest in what the person is saying. Looking into the distance with glazed eyes and an offhand “yeah,” every now and then will not take you anywhere.

But nothing works like sharing common interests. Kunal liked a girl in college and made his moves after checking out her interests. He was lucky to discover that they had common interests.

Prachi married Harish after going around with him for four years. It was love at first sight for them but they were too shy to express it. Prachi laughs, “I knew he wanted to talk to me. He’s shy and I’m the reserved sort.. so none of us could make the first move. Charm appeal After a point, she got very desperate to talk to him. One day she wore a bright T-shirt with a catchy message on it. It worked. She laughs, “I can easily recommend my tried-and-tested formula to those in a similar situation.”

For many, flirting with someone doesn’t necessarily mean they want to hit the sheets with that person. It’s just a mood-booster. They never fail to compliment even a 70-year-old or flash a smile at a waiter or liftman. The bottom line is - you never know who’s watching you. Your charm could be working on a cute bystander unawares.

Source: HT Cafe 

Some say “football”. Some say “baseball”. Canadians say “hockey”. Indian say ” Cricket.” The rest of the world says “soccer”. (Actually, they say “football”, too…but they mean “soccer”.)

I am also great lover of “CRICKET” but after recent Harbhajan-Symonds controversy on racial slur i think that Cricket is no more a Gentleman’s game and so i have now moved away from Cricket.

Now I say: “kissing”. Yes, kissing is the greatest sport on earth.

Kissing is the “Pact” between two players and it is played in such a way that no one can accuse each other of breaking the trust, not like of Kumble-Ponting pact which was breached by Clarke. There is no racial comments involved. There will be no wide criticism even if you fail once or twice.

Allow me to explain just a few more reasons.

• Kissing is the most versatile sport around. There are so many types of kisses to choose from – at least one for just about any occasion.
• Kissing is easy to transport. It really doesn’t matter where you are. You can kiss: at the gym, in the boardroom, in the space shuttle.
• Kissing requires so little equipment, which means you can do it even when not prepared for the occasion, and even when you have to travel light. This makes it the ideal participation sport for businessmen, world travelers etc
• Kissing always livens things up. Try this: the next time you are in an oh-so-booooring meeting that seems to last oh-so-foreeeeever, why not just kiss somebody. Go ahead; try it. See how it livens things up?
• Kissing is legal in all 50 states and most earth-bound countries. Rumors are circulating that kissing will even be legalized soon on Mars, Jupiter and in Afghanistan.
• Kissing is 100% biodegradable, so when you kiss somebody, you help the environment.
• Kissing is safe to do in a moving vehicle, as long as you are not driving.
• Kissing is non toxic…unless you kiss somebody who has just swallowed a bottle of Drano.
• Kissing is non-fattening. This is perhaps the best news of all, because dieters now have something to keep their mouths busy while not eating, and smokers can quit smoking without having to chew candies until they a) need to diet or b) induce diabetes. So KISSING PREVENTS DIABETES
• Kissing meets the toughest safety regulations of any national or international sporting organization. Kissing has a tremendous safety record, except for the occasional locked braces.

Nanhe recently was fed up of not having a Girl Friend. One day he was just mulling over his badluck when suddenly he realised, it is good if you are not having a Girl Friend. Read on ……

1. You can stare at any Girl.
2. You don’t have to spend money on her.
3. No girlfriend, no emotional blackmailing.
4. Having a girlfriend is hot, not having a girlfriend is automatically cool, and every one loves to be a cool guy.
5. You won’t have to tolerate someone else defining, “right” and “wrong” for you.
6. Girlfriend can get so possessive that you can’t do anything according your wishes anymore.
7. You wont have to see boring love stories instead of sports.
8. No nonstop nonsense.
9. You wont have to hide your telephone bills.
10. You won’t have to waste paper writing love letters. No more endless waiting for your date to arrive at some weird shop place.

Nanhe recently met few of his friends who were dating different women (By Nationality, Colour, etc) and found some of the weird and funny experiences of them while they were busy Dating. Read it and let Nanhe know if you have any other experience as well.

INDIAN WOMEN:
First date: Meet her parents.
Second date: Set the date of the wedding.
Third date: Wedding night.

IRISH WOMEN:
First Date: You both get blind drunk and make love
Second Date: You both get blind drunk and make love
20th Anniversary: You both get blind drunk and make love

CHINESE WOMEN:
First date: You get to buy her an expensive dinner but nothing happens.
Second date: You buy her an even more expensive dinner. Nothing happens
again.
Third date: You don’t even get to the third date and you’ve already realized
nothing is ever going to happen.

BLACK WOMEN:
First Date: You get to buy her a real expensive dinner.
Second Date: You get to buy her and her girlfriends a real expensive dinner.
Third Date: You get to pay her rent.
Tenth Date: She’s pregnant by someone other than you.

ARAB WOMEN:
First Date: Mother, Father, Brothers, Sisters, Cousins, Aunts, Uncles,
Friends and entire community finds out.
Second Date: You are shot dead.
No third date.

ITALIAN WOMEN:
First Date: You take her to a play and an expensive restaurant.
Second Date: You meet her parents and her Mom makes spaghetti & meatballs.
Third Date: You make love, she wants to marry you & insists on a 24-carat
ring.
5th Anniversary: You already have 5 kids together & hate the thought of
making love.
6th Anniversary: You find yourself a Mistress.