Nanhe Nawaab

One day Nanhe was surfing the internet when he came across a very weird news that very soon there is going to be a political party for people who are “serious” about sex. The party name is ‘The Australian Sex Party.’ Well, you might think that this is the first such party but in reality we had similar parties in Canada and Columbia in the year 2005. The parties fought the elections as well and got less than 1% of the total votes. The main agenda of this political party includes promoting for, ‘a national sex education curriculum, reducing censorship, abolishing the government’s proposed internet filter and supporting gay marriage’.
Well this political party is unique in a sense because the issues which it plans to address our real sensitive issues. Nanhe just told me that, if the similar party get into Indian Politics, it can do wonders. Our politicians are so power hungry and vote inclined that they will not miss the opportunity to try their luck on the ticket of such party. Well there is no price of guessing that the number of sex workers, transgenders, homosexual, etc is huge. Till date we have not included them in our scheme of things. Mumbai is Asia’s biggest sex industry and this chunk of the population will form the vote bank of such a political party in the country. Homosexuals and transgenders are now raising their voices for equal rights. Then there is a group of people like you who illegally download porn films from the internet and watch them. Imagine, once you are watching a porn film and at the time of your climax, someone knocks at the door. You open the door and found that police has raided and you are arrested!! Kya ho raha tha aur kya ho gaya. So don’t you want that porn should be legalized. The number of such people also runs in millions. Combining all the group, you can sense that this political party will have large vote bank.
If any of you reading this post is interested to climb the ladder of success in the politics, you must give the serious thought to this proposal of Nanhe. But you must be prepared for some serious opposition from the conservative group which can turn violent and you might pay with your life. Though this conservative group never raises its voice when their is rape or they will never lend a helping hand in rehabilitating the victim.
As a country we need to focus some of the serious problems that trend to threaten our society such as AIDS, sexualisation of children, children being exposed to material, injustice to transgenders etc and if a political party can help them, then it is worth taking a risk.

Nanhe’s Conclusion:
Sex is as important as food but yet we consider it a taboo. It is time we recognise that sex should not be taboo; and that it does mix with politics. Though we should not promote the public display of affection and stop any such move which degrades the morals in the society but at the same time, a broad based sex party that promotes sex positive attitudes, sexual health and the rights of sex workers and sexual minorities is urgently needed in an environment where religious groups and conservatives think they have the right to regulate or morally prescribe the boundaries and privacy of individuals’ sex lives.

Nanhe once asked me—–

Why do we celebrate birthdays? What is it that we are toasting? Is it the fact that we have survived another year against many odds? Are we marking the progress we have made, our cumulative achievements and possessions? Is a birthday the expression of hope sprung eternal to live another year? I’ve been told that I am oddity when it comes to birthdays.  I hate celebrating my birthday.  I always have.  I don’t mind celebrating someone else’s birthday, just mine. This is what Nanhe said.

Actually I also echo the views of Nanhe because, I never find anything very especial to celebrate the Birthdays. There are no specific reasons but still…..I feel there is nothing great to celebrate the Birthdays. So i don’t celebrate but would like to thank all my well wishers and enemies (if any). Because being with them, i have learnt some invaluable lessons.

I’ll wake up tomorrow and embrace another year. Another year with more laughter than tears, more success than failure, more hope than despair, and more love than I deserve. Bring it on!

Oh, and dear Lord, thank you for the gift of this last year, with all its hard-learned lessons, and bringing me through safe and healthy, with my family intact. With your blessings I’ll make it through another.
Thank you all for your wishes.

A STEAMY sex session in the morning can keep you in good health, say researchers.

According to a research from Queen’s University in Belfast, a good morning session at least three times a week decreases the risk of heart attack or stroke by half and a regular session improves circulation, thereby reducing blood pressure.

According to a study in New Scientist, a steamy session twice a week enhances IgA, an antibody that provides protection against microbes that multiply in body secretions, reports The Sun.

Morning sex also helps in alleviating arthritis and migraine. It burns around 300 calories an hour that simultaneously diminishes the risk of developing diabetes.

Moreover, an American study involving 300 sexually active women whose partners did not use condoms revealed that they were less prone to de pression.

They’re trendy, career-driven and childfree, yet working singles are the unhappiest lot, says a new Australian research.

The Australian population has been divided by “profilers” into five categories in a bid to understand their lives and issues that impact well-being.

The new social categories are- connected retirees who are happy but possibly poor, financially secure working couples who are well educated, happy and rich; time-pressured couples with children who are stressed but happy; dissatisfied working-age singles who are healthy and successful but unhappy; marginalised Australians who have no money and are the unhappiest of all.

The research, released by the federal Families, Community Services and Indigenous Affairs Department, surveyed 6000 adults questioning ‘clusters’ about work, relationship, finances, well being, health and risky behaviours.

The survey showed working singles are unhappier than retirees, working couples and young families. Researchers noted that the cluster survey was ‘broadbrush’ but significant enough to categorise each group.

The singles group, which had an average age of 33, includes singles who worked full time, earned more than an average income and had fair job satisfaction. Yet despite all of the above, despite good connections with family and friends, they were unhappy about their single status and had ‘low life satisfaction’.

The only unhappier Australians were those on the margins, who include single parents, the unemployed and those with disabilities. Psychologist Evelyn Field says singles working long hours were dissatisfied about having no partner. “They would be anxious, stressed and depressed at times,” The Daily Telegraph quoted her, as saying.

However, Flinders University health and well-being expert, Professor Carol Grbich, said there were two stories about singles. “The survey fits with what has been going on with singles for a long time, but the question is why?” said Professor Grbich. “Certainly, it is the singles who are depressed, who commit suicide at much higher rates,” she added. She says her own children reflect the single status as being in “this transitional stage”.

“My feeling is society is stuck in this transitional stage between coupledom and singledom and its range of other options, but for some people, they don’t adjust (to the single state),” she said.

Source Times of India

Melbourne, Aug 25 (ANI): Finding hard to land a date? Well, Sydney writer Sam de Brito’s new book, ‘Building a Better Bloke’ might just help.

Brito has admitted that he has had his share of dud dates – partly because his past approach to dating involved getting drunk.

But now, he has made a few adjustments when it comes to luring the opposite sex. And he has urged other Aussie men to do the same in his new book.

“I’m not trying to teach men how to be a pick-up artist or a stud, I want to show men how to build self-esteem, build a life for themselves – which in turn will attract women,” the Courier Mail quoted Brito, as saying.

According to the 39-year-old, his generation has lost the art of communicating with women.

“Aussie guys have fallen through the cracks. We like to think of Australian men as bold and confident and a lot of them aren’t,” he said.

He said that for some, the biggest fear in life is approaching and striking up a conversation with a woman.

In this case, he has suggested practice and a sense of humour is the key.

The catchphrase of his book is: “Find a life and you’ll find love”.

“The biggest thing is not to look cool, but to have a life with lots of interests. Become involved in your life, look after yourself, and you’re primed to meet someone,” he said.

He said that good manners and keeping clean are also important.

“Be a gentleman. Respect yourself. Even if you’re funny and charming, you’re not going to get far with a woman if you smell,” he said.

Besides clean sheets and clean fingernails, ‘Building a Better Bloke’ also reminds men of the simple things, like holding a door open for women.

De Brito’s 10 tips for lure woman:

Stay healthy

Don’t abuse alcohol or drugs

Have a job that means something to you

Be busy with your own activities

Be well groomed and clean

Have a sense of humour

Talk to women as individuals, not as a gender

Be a gentleman

Don’t mix with loser friends

Have a clean bedroom, clean sheets – and a lamp to create romantic lighting (ANI)

Source: Yahoo

GOING UNDER the knife to reclaim virginity is a trend that seems to have shifted base from the Middle East to smaller Indian cities.

City doctors say that where almost 80 per cent of surgeries were conducted on those from the Middle East a few years ago, now women from small cities and towns in Maharashtra and neighbouring states – like Surat and Baroda – form the bulk.

If restructuring the hymen can help restructure lives after premarital sex, then hymenoplasty seems to be the right answer. The procedure involves creating a membrane about an inch into the vagina that resembles a natural hymen.

“I get occasional requests from young women who want to know about such procedures. Most of the requests come from small towns or some select communities, where virginity really counts,” said Dr Rishima Pai, gynaecologist with Lilavati and Jaslok hospital.

“With awareness and easy availability, more women are coming forward, sometimes accompanied by family members,” said Dr Milind Wagh, cosmetic surgeon at Dr L.H.Hiranandani Hospital.

“Another reason for the growing trend maybe the costs involved. With the procedure coming for anything between Rs 25,000 and Rs 40,000, those from small town can afford it. The demand from these regions is more because acceptance levels of premarital sex is lower,” said Dr Mohan Thomas, cosmetic surgeon at Breach Candy Hospital.

“It is disturbing but true that women are expected to be the epitome of virtue. As long as it’s her decision, it’s fine. But family and societal expectations to make her appear ‘pure’ is unfair,” said Dr Sharita Shah, psychiatrist at Saifee, Bhatia and Hurkisondas hospitals.

Image Courtesy: www.fabsmusic.co.uk/background/Fabs-ILostMyVirginity.jpg

Sheyla Hershey, a 28-year-old wife and mother from Houston, has had 8 surgeries on her breast to get them to their current size of FFF. Sheyla has around 2 quarts of silicone in each breasts and she wants more!
Brazil native Sheyla Hershey, already listed in the Guiness Book of World Records for having the largest breast implants, is after the top prize, the record for the world’s largest breasts.

Currently held by Lolo Ferrari, that record is within Hershey’s reach if she can stretch a Texas law just like she does those massive 34FFF breasts. Lolo Ferrari currently holds the world record for the largest breast implants and according to the Guinness Book of Records, each of her breasts weighed 6.2 lbs. Ferrari died in 2000.

Seems that Texas prohibits breast implants containing more than 1,000 cubic centimeters of silicone for fear of scar tissue forming due to the strain of carrying more than a qiart of silicone in each breast.
1. Texas state law limits each breast to 1,000 cubic centimeters of silicone
2. Medical risks: Back and shoulder pain, scar tissue and the possible failure to detect underlying breast cancer.

Sheyla Hershey Quote
“I want to look better each day, every day Everybody’s got a dream inside, you know? And, it’s good when you can make your dream come true.”

Now isn’t that something very weird or it is just the case where a person is chasing a dream without caring for the life. whatever be the case, one thing is clear– Bigger is Better. Ha Ha!!

What are your views??

More info, Pics and Videos of Sheyla Hershey here.

Hey Nanhe was just continuing with his thesis when he concluded the following. This article is on Drunkards and is taken from Funny Jokes.

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Innovative

2. Preliminary

3. Proliferation

4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Specificity

2. Anti-constitutionalistically

3. Passive-aggressive disorder

4. Transubstantiate

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. No thanks, I’m married.

2. Nope, no more booze for me!

3. Sorry, but you’re not really my type.

4. Doner Kebab? No thanks, I’m not hungry.

5. Good evening, officer. Isn’t it lovely out tonight?

6. Oh, I couldn’t! No one wants to hear me sing karaoke.

7. I’m not interested in fighting you.

8. Thank you, but I won’t make any attempt to dance, I have no coordination. I’d hate to look like a fool!

9. Where is the nearest bathroom? I refuse to pee in this car park or on the side of the road.

10. I must be going home now, as I have to work in the morning.

This interesting story appeared in Hindustan Times some days back. Read it!

A FEMALE real estate agent’s sex addiction has compelled her to pounce on more than one thousand men. Amy Michaels, 32, has confessed on bedding over 1000 men. However, she insists she’s no slut.

“I’ve had sex with at least 1,000 men-but I’m no slut. I’m a sex addict,” News of the World quoted Michaels, as saying.

“I began doing it with clients while we were supposed to be viewing houses. I had a boyfriend at the time but it wasn’t enough. At the same time I was also at it with a colleague at work. We used a house we were supposed to be selling and one night I ended up in a threesome with him and his flatmate.”

She lost her virginity at an early age of 17 when she took a job at McDonald’s while at college on a business studies course. “I ended up sleeping with the boss while I was already having a fling with another boy there, having sex anywhere we could, even before kiddies’ parties. Her addiction even made her pounce on a security guard while working as a PR at a music festival.

Well Nanhe discussed about this woman. Many of his friends said that she is a slut while others believed that she is a sex maniac. Nanhe felt that the lady is a “SOCIAL WORKER”.
Yes because she is doing social work by providing “SEX” to so many men who live and die for sex only. This woman will be huge success in India and will be received very well by Indian men. India is already facing the problem of dipping sex ratio. If experts are to be believed, there will be huge shortage of girls in next 50 years and thus many men will remain unmarried whole life. This woman will be “handy” to all those unmarried men. In fact India requires more such “social workers”. These social work can also check the crime rate against woman such as rape, molestation etc. Imagine someone asking the lady about her profession. She says “Hi! I am social worker and would like to help you out as well.” It sounds great yaar.
Nanhe salutes this Woman.

Nanhe says—- always prefer sex over chocolate. This article is for those who cannot find sex. यह लेख केवल उनके लीए है, जो अभी तक मौके का इंतज़ार कर रहे हैं….

Its just to console their hearts and motivate them unless they “open their account”. Carry on with your search. All the Best……………….

1. You can easily get a chocolate.
2. Chocolate satisfies even when it has gone soft.
3. Two people of the same sex can have chocolate without being labeled by names such as GAY or LESBIAN.
4. The word “commitment” has no importance while having chocolate.
5. With chocolate there’s no need to “fake it”.
6. You can have as many kinds of chocolate as you can want.
7. With chocolate size doesn’t matter.
8. You can even ask a stranger for chocolate without getting your face slapped.
9. You can safely have chocolate while you are driving.
10. You are never too young or too old for chocolate.